NC Fathers Rights

NC Putative Father, Adoption, and Child Custody

NC Putative Father and the CourtsBefore discussing NC Putative Fathers as it relates to Adoption and Child Custody cases in the family courts, we have to inform you that NC Fathers IS NOT A LAW FIRM and nothing in this article should be taken as legal advice. If you have questions about laws as it relates to putative fathers, adoptions, or child custody then you must contact a lawyer. NC Fathers is an organization of NC non-custodial parents, their families, putative fathers and their families who have witnessed very destructive laws and patterns in the family courts that have for decades alienated and marginalized non-custodial fathers and putative fathers from their biological children. OUR GOALS are to build a large organization of these families who we use to put pressure on politicians and others to end this destructive process. If you identify with this article, then we ask that you join us on FACEBOOK and join our MAILING LIST to help be a part of this process. We also ask that you invite your immediate family and share this article on Putative Fathers with others on the major social networking sites like Google+, Twitter, and Facebook. In NC, a putative father is a father of a child where he is not married to the mother and there are very dire problems that these fathers must overcome if they wish to be in their child(ren)’s life. In cases where the mother is married and she is pregnant by a putative father, then the man she is married to is considered the legal father.
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Posts related to NC Putative Fathers, Adoptions, and Child Custody – NC Adoption Laws Carteret County Divorce Attorney

NC Child Custody and Adoptions for Fathers

If you came here looking for a NC Putative Father Registry, there is not one in the State. Why? Because NC Legislators are more concerned about adoption lawyers making money and the adoption industry furthering their mission. We seriously doubt anyone cares that thousands of kids each year get adopted out when there was a Father that never knew he had a child to raise or support.

If you are a NC non-custodial family member or a putative father family, then we ask that you click on the red and blue graphic below to get educated on the many problems we have identified in the family courts that need to be addressed by politicians in NC.


NC Putative Fathers and Adoptions

As a putative father, if you help conceive a child that is born out of wedlock, then you have zero legal rights to the child unless you go through the legal process of legitimation. This process is very straight forward IF the mother of the child does not contest the action. If you are present at the time of the birth, then most hospitals in NC will present you and the mother with what is called an Affidavit of Parentage that if signed and witnessed by hospital personnel gives some weight in legitimation. Many lawyers we have spoken to say that it is very much a binding document, put the mother can rescind this document within a certain time period. This is why it is best to hire an attorney long before the child is born and start a hearing on legitimation and here is why. We have many examples of fathers in our organization who were putative fathers and had their child adopted out by the mother before they could get their day in court. Once the child is adopted out, it is unlikely that you will ever see the child again. Of course, this assumes that the mother even told the father that he had a child to legitimate in the first place. We also have several fathers within our organization who learned that they had biological children adopted out years after the fact and in all of these cases these fathers would have wanted to legitimate these kids and be active fathers. In NC, there is very strict and dangerous laws that says when a mother is not married, she does NOT have to identify the father or give any information about said father to adoptive parents or agencies. To us, this is a very sick process. If you are a putative father in North Carolina and you wish to be an active father and seize upon your legal rights to the child, TIME IS VERY MUCH OF THE ESSENCE.

Again, if the mother of the child does not contest legitimation, then the process is very easy. If she does contest legitimation, then the courts will order a DNA test to prove you are the biological father and if you are, then you can start the process of legitimation and securing legal rights. But notice we didn’t say anything about physical rights for which we will discuss below.

NC Putative Fathers and Child Custody in the Family Courts

As a father in NC, you know that the NC family courts have been historically anti-father, and this statement is further compounded if you are a putative father. While it is very rare for a father to get physical custody of his child in North Carolina unless the mother is proven to be a danger to the child, it is even more rare for a putative father to get physical custody of his child. Some issues that will help you out in this matter is to show that you are prepared to help support the mother while she is pregnant and most certainly the child after he/she is born until you can get a custody hearing. Additionally, the default visitation order for legal fathers in North Carolina is 4 days a month, but for some reason putative fathers who legitimate their children do not even get this amount of time with their children. We aren’t sure what factors are involved with this decision making, but we think that it has a lot to do with Judges feeling like the putative father was just having sex with the mother and never really intended on being with her in a relationship or fathering a child, and that this will cause problems down the road in forcing these two parents to have to meet for visitation on a regular basis. Of course, nobody ever asks why the mother helped create this very problematic issue, and she is generally given a lot of rights without much responsibility while the putative father is given a lot of responsibility with very little rights.

As of the 2010 Census, it was shown that 40% of children born in the United States were conceived by unmarried parents who were still unmarried to each other at the time of the birth. This has opened the door for a very large percentage of children being adopted out without the biological father having any say so in the matter, especially when there is no law in North Carolina holding mothers accountable for not knowing who the father of their child is and identifying him.

This issue of adoption and putative fathers has a significant impact in NC in that we see an industry developing where gay and lesbian couples, and adoption agencies, will want to capitalize on current law that does not require a mother to divulge to a suspected father that she is pregnant and thinking about adopting out. Our organization is neutral of gay marriage, and if gay and lesbian couples want children that is perfectly acceptable. However, we think that should ONLY happen after a putative father has been notified that he has a child and can make a decision to sign off on the adoption or not. This is going to be a HUGE issue in coming years where we will essentially see millions of new gay and lesbian couples and adoption agencies potentially pushing to have fathers neutralized so they can adopt.

If you read this article as a putative father in NC, or a member of the family who has been through this situation, then we again ask that you join our organization’s MAILING LIST and FACEBOOK PAGE to help be a part of our mission to reform the family courts.

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April 29, 2013 - Posted by | Uncategorized


  1. I think it is pretty sick that there is no Fathers Registry here in North Carolina. I know two Fathers who found out like 3 years later that they had children who were adopted out and who wanted to raise their children. Better yet, instead of a Fathers Registry, why don’t we just hold Mothers accountable for knowing who they are having babies with and force them to reveal the Father before any adoptions can take place?


    Comment by Caryn | May 31, 2013 | Reply

    • Caryn, two reasons 1) Having a NC Putative Father registry would mean less adoptions and there are many lawyers in NC who want to make money off those adoptions, and an adoption industry that wants to have children adopted at any cost. 2) Forcing Mothers to reveal the Father of a child would mean that Mother would be on the hook for child support if the father got custody and we know that the State of North Carolina is not ready for Mothers to be paying child support to a Father.


      Comment by stompkinsnc | May 31, 2013 | Reply

  2. I am a Putative Father who signed the Affidavit of Parentage at the hospital and the Mother signed as well, then she refused to let me see the child because she said that she believes another man is the Father BUT she wants me to pay child support? This is truly a CRAZY SYSTEM!


    Comment by David | May 31, 2013 | Reply

    • David, I believe the rules on the Affidavit of Parentage states that either parent can resend the document within I believe 60 or 90 days but you need to contact an attorney immediately to find out. The road as a Putative Father is a tough one because of Amendment One and every day you delay the courts will say you had no interest in your child when in fact the system is so screwed up that it can take a year or more to get it straightened out.


      Comment by stompkinsnc | May 31, 2013 | Reply

  3. I have just found out my ex girlfriend had a baby I believe and was told it was my baby but she has put down her new boyfriend as the father we r trying to get somebody to do a DNA to prove it is mine but I am hitting brick walls in trying to get somebody to help me. They said if she asked for one they would give it to her. But she won’t ask for it because she knows that would give me rights to him. Any help u could give me would be greatly appreciated. Thank You in advance.


    Comment by Charles B | September 1, 2013 | Reply

    • Hi Charles,
      Keep in mind we are not lawyers, nor is the information we are about to give legal advise. You need to seek representation by a NC family law attorney in your county immediately. Make no decisions based on the information we are about to provide.

      In NC, when a Man conceives a child with a Woman he is not married to, he is considered a Putative Father and has NO legal rights to the child. In fact, if she is married, then the Man she is married to is considered the legal Father.

      There are two ways you can be established as the child’s legal Father. You can hire an attorney and force her into court and force her to get a DNA test. If you are proven to be the Father, then you will have legal rights to either attempt a child custody action (which you will likely lose) and you will pay child support. You will also likely be given very minimal visitation. The second option is if when she files a child support request or goes on State assistance, child support enforcement will have you tested.

      Also keep in mind that right now she has the sole authority to say that anyone is the child’s Father and can legally adopt the child out regardless if you are the biological Father.

      If you wish to have access and a life with this child, then you must hire a lawyer IMMEDIATELY because once the child is adopted out, he/she is gone.


      Comment by stompkinsnc | September 1, 2013 | Reply

  4. Another putative father shot down in flames…


    Comment by Navin R. Johnson | October 13, 2013 | Reply

  5. Dad faces next hurdle in custody battle…


    Comment by Navin R. Johnson | December 14, 2013 | Reply

  6. Sad fact my son has a baby due any day, any second and for all I know she could have already been born. However because they broke up months ago and he finally stop listening to her and her friends put him down and call his things like no good P.O.S. He FINALLY pulled himself up by his but straps and is getting his life back together met really nice young lady and is really in a good place. His Ex hates him more now then when they broke up. She has had her friends start messaging me and my Daughter stating she is tired of us and our Bullying her and harassing her as well. I can promise you I have never been mean to anyone in my life . Now did she like it when I had had enough of her having nothing nice to say about my son and tell her he was doing much better yep I did . And nope, she probably did not like what I had to say . But It was the truth. He has have given this girl money to help with expenses ,helped pay for her baby shower , bought her a really nice new crib , Diapers , clothes you name it . And now she has cut us all off . And we have no way of even knowing when the baby is born . YA know fine mess me over . But My son deserves to be there when that baby is born . This should really be frowned upon in the courts . These fathers should not be denied the right to bond with their babies from birth. Unless of course their is abuse


    Comment by Susan Smith | August 7, 2015 | Reply

    • Susan the Putative father laws in NC are disgusting. In one breath they scream about fathers not being active in their kids lives, then they create a law where the father does not even have to be told he is a father if he is not married to the mother and the child can be adopted out without his knowledge.

      I hope more women in paternal families start talking to legislators about this issue, because the adoption industry loves it when putative fathers do not have to be told so that they can have quicker adoptions.

      Also, our research shows that putative fathers in the NC Family Courts do not even get the the every other weekend that married fathers get like it was all his fault that an out of wedlock birth happened.


      Comment by stompkinsnc | August 7, 2015 | Reply

      • WOW ! This is just wrong. They were together and their relationship started going south when she started talking about not giving his daughter his last name. I mean How can a woman do that and expect to have a good relationship? And God help her if she places my Grandbaby up for Adoption . Hell hath no Furry. This is Unbelievable . Mothers can surrender their right in the first week and have no consequences but a father has no choice but to be at the mercy of a Bitter woman who wants revenge and used an innocent child as the PAWN . And that is exactly what she is doing and it is so wrong. I just don’t know what to do to help my Son.


        Comment by Susan Smith | August 8, 2015

      • You need to seek an attorney IMMEDIATELY and show that he and your family have an interest in the baby. You need to legitimate the child via the courts and then she will likely ask for a DNA test, do it. If it is his child then he will have legal rights, the child will have his last name, and he can petition the courts for custody.

        Just keep in mind that this is a time when very serious false allegations usually come out, so have your son NOT ever be alone with her and do not text her or call except ton ask about the baby.

        Putative fathers that go this route as opposed to child support enforcement (which she will seek) legitimating the child have a much better chance having some type of life with the child.

        Keep in mind that we are NOT a law firm and this is for informational purposes only.


        Comment by stompkinsnc | August 8, 2015

      • stompkinsnc, I will certainly do this first thing Monday . And we have been unable to even reach her. She has completely cut us and I mean all of us even my Mother who would be the babies Great Grandmother off. But she has been using her friends to send messages and they have been very belligerent foul, and disrespectful. Name calling, degrading and taunting us because we wont have access. Just very cruel .


        Comment by SSMITH | August 8, 2015

      • I just want to reiterate something VERY VERY important. At this stage in the game is when insane allegations start coming out and a putative father is already hanging by a thin thread anyway, an allegation of anything at this point, and lawyers teach clients to make these allegations to inflame the situation so they can bill more, but NOBODY should be alone with her and in a position of he said she said. I can guarantee you when this does get to a court of law there will be an allegation that he beat her everyday and there will be organizations coming to her side and it puts the judge in a politically correct position. There will be a campaign of massive false allegations once you get to court and likely over the life of the child every few years.


        Comment by stompkinsnc | August 9, 2015

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