Disgust with Christian Adoption Services in Matthews and Rocky Mount NC
Christian Adoption Services is a Non-Profit and Licensed Adoption Agency in Matthews and Rocky Mount NC who, according to their website, has a “primary purpose to provide domestic and international children the opportunity of having a loving, Christ-centered family”. NC Fathers wants to bring to your attention Greg Johns, a Father who lives in Wilmington NC and who’s son was adopted out to foster parents in Winston-Salem NC about two years ago by Christian Adoption Services. In this matter, Greg Johns was dating a women who became pregnant during the relationship and decided to place the child up for adoption, without notifying Mr. Johns that he even had a child. After learning about having a child, and finding out about the adoption, Mr Johns contacted Christian Adoption Services and attempted to intervene thinking that this adoption agency, being a “Christian centered organization” would much prefer to have a biological child with a loving father that wants to provide, love, and care for his child. But here is where things get disgusting, Christian Adoption Services believes that what they have done is within the law, and stands by this adoption. And, it seems that they are being protected by law in this adoption. Nothing in this article should be taken as our organization saying that this adoption agency has done anything illegal, but I think a lot of fathers, and their extended families really have to question this agency on moral grounds.
Posts related to Christian Adoption Services in Matthews/Rocky Mount NC and Greg Johns – WWAY Videos, Fathers and Families Take On This Case, Problems With The Adoption Process, Judge Elizabeth Trosch, NC Adoption Laws
Here is the problem, in NC a women who finds herself pregnant never has to inform anyone about the father, if she even knows. Christian Adoption Services certainly has the legal obligation to not adopt out children when there is a legal father, but in this case Greg Johns never knew he had a son and thus could not legitimate the child as his legal son. It would seem to us that in these matters, adoption agencies would want to do the right thing and start working to bring about new legislation that ends this disgusting process of mothers refusing to identify fathers and letting them be adopted out to non-biological families without even attempting to find the biological father. Much about this case is hard to decipher at best. NC Fathers has information that Christian Adoption Services probably did just enough under the law to find the father of this child, but because the mother refused to work with them, they were able to place the child with foster parents. Of course, one has to wonder if many adoption agencies hope that these fathers are never found so that the adoption process can be seen as the “saving grace for children”.
This issue of adoption and putative fathers has a significant impact in NC in that we see an industry developing where gay and lesbian couples, and adoption agencies, will want to capitalize on current law that does not require a mother to divulge to a suspected father that she is pregnant and thinking about adopting out. Our organization is neutral of gay marriage, and if gay and lesbian couples want children that is perfectly acceptable. However, we think that should ONLY happen after a putative father has been notified that he has a child and can make a decision to sign off on the adoption or not. This is going to be a HUGE issue in coming years where we will essentially see millions of new gay and lesbian couples and adoption agencies pushing to have fathers neutralized so they can adopt.
Allegedly, because Greg Johns has paperwork from Christian Adoption Services showing that someone crossed out his name and inserted another name, it is suspicious that perhaps this agency knew about the biological father but tried to contact a man by the other name. In the regular world, this would be called fraud, but we will have to see how this plays out.
NC Father believes that ALL children deserve to have two loving biological parents, and the immense amount of love, care, resources and opportunities that both parents extended families bring. In cases where one parent refuses to be there for his/her child, then we believe the other biological parent is the optimum choice for children, not adoption. But in the State of NC, there is a process that skips the other parent, and this seems to be tied into the marginalization and discrediting of Fathers equal parentage and access to his child(ren).
Christian Adoption Services and Maintaining The Adoption Process Core Values
As stated earlier, we believe that Christian Adoption Services has probably followed the law and did everything right legally. But there is a bigger question here that seeks to undermine and shed bad light on all adoptions in North Carolina, and it would seem that this adoption agency would want to bend over backwards to make sure this case does not expose the ugly side of many adoptions. Why is Christian Adoption Services not beating on Legislators doors demanding that new legislation be introduced that stops this process of mothers seeking adoption for kids when there is probably a loving father that does want to be there for the child, and she seeks to undermine that relationship?
But more importantly, why are NC fathers, step-mothers, paternal grandmothers and grandfathers, and paternal aunts and uncles not calling Christian Adoption Services and Legislators to stop this process? Was the mother in this case offered money to adopt her child out instead of identifying the father? Is there some behind the scenes system where agencies and people benefit financially from the adoption process and the identification of a father seeks to spoil that? NC Fathers has no idea, but this case certainly has to bring credibility to these questions given that Christian Adoption Services in Rocky Mount and Matthews NC allegedly has done everything to see this child placed with adoptive parents over a biological parent. Look, we realize in the vast majority of times, adoption is a great thing. But doing so at the expense of a loving biological parent is only going to shed bad light on this process, and it would seem to us that the adoptive parents and this adoption agency would want to maintain the integrity of adoption and do the right thing and return the child to his now discovered biological
father.
Help Send The Message To Christian Adoption Services in Matthews and Rocky Mount NC That Biological Fathers Matter, And Until New Legislation and The Legal System Intervenes In This Matter, It Is In The Best Interest Of This Child And The Adoption Process To Return Him to Greg Johns
While primarily an organization seeking to bring reform to the NC Family Courts and Social Services agencies across NC who marginalize LEGAL fathers, only seeking to devalue them as visitor to their children, who only need 4 days a month with their children, and who must pay a big government agency money in order to maintain that relationship, it is not hard to draw a parallel to our issue and this issue with Christian Adoption Services and Greg Johns. Our issue is that in NC, there is a historical bias in the family courts that values mothers and children only, and that fathers, step-mothers, paternal grandmothers and aunts are but needed nuisance to pay for Welfare, Low Income Assistance Programs using Child Support Enforcement, and maintaining Rich Lawyers. Our GOAL is to unite ALL non-custodial fathers, step-mothers, paternal grandmothers and aunts around a central lobby that forces reform in the courts so that our children can enjoy the EQUAL resources and opportunities we bring to our children. Please consider joining our MAILING LIST and FACEBOOK PAGE if you are in a non-custodial FAMILY and want to help. NC Fathers also wants Christian Adoption Services in Matthews and Rocky Mount NC to understand that this organization has over 1800 daily readers, a mailing list of 4,765 members, and we are slowly building social media channels to unite the estimate 4.7 million non-custodial FAMILY members in NC. It sure would benefit everyone if we could say that your adoption agency did the right thing and returned the child in this matter to Greg Johns to maintain the integrity of the adoption process even if that means one less adoption in NC.
To learn more about Greg Johns, and his issue with Christian Adoption Services, please visit Mr Johns Website (Donation For Legal Expenses Greatly Encouraged) and his FACEBOOK Page. Additionally, if you are a non-custodial FAMILY member, be it a father, step-mother, paternal grandmother, or paternal aunt who was moved by this article on Christian Adoption Services and the adoption process, we ask that you routinely and extensively share this article with others using Facebook, Twitter, Linkedin, and other social networking sites. Also be sure to click on the RELATED posts that we linked above to learn more about the NC system where mothers can refuse to cooperate with adoption agencies in identifying a father who may not even know that he has a child in order to facilitate an adoption. Surely, this has to scare a lot of Fathers, Step-Mothers, Paternal Grandmothers and Aunts who VOTE in NC?
Quoting N.C. Gen. Stat. § 7B-1111(a)(5) – “The father of an illegitimate child may have his parental rights terminated for the father’s failure to legitimate the child” and “The father of an illegitimate child does not have the same notice rights in an adoption proceeding involving the illegitimate child”. But in this case, the father didn’t know he had a child to legitimate him so the adoption agency seized on this opportunity. At face value, this affirms two things 1) That Christian Adoption Services is safe legally unless a court proves that the crossed out name of Greg Johns shows deception and fraud, and 2) That we have a NC Law that needs revising. Until Mothers identify a father and given the chance to legitimate, NO ADOPTIONS!
Regardless of marriage vs unmarried or legitimate vs illegitimate, kids should be raised by biological parents.
What we do hold Christian Adoption Services accountable for is it’s moral judgement. While perhaps safe legally, a christian group should have gone to greater depths to find Mr Johns.
Any further updates to this matter will be written here.
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This is about as disgusting as I have ever seen. As a female AND mother I am condemning this adoption agency for not going to greater lengths to find this father, or not rectifying after he was discovered. How is the world was he supposed to KNOW he had a child? And Christian Adoption Services is holding HIM accountable for it? This is encouraging millions of deceitful mothers across NC to do the same!
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CHRISTIAN ADOPTION SERVICES…….really????????????? Not a good name for them at all….after reading this story….perhaps they need to change the name….people should be really careful in selecting this kind of adoption agency….I am sure they have *GUIDELINES* to follow….but they are like any other group…they make up their own rules as they go….SHAME ON THEM….this should be against the law.
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My wife and I have several friends who have used CAS for their adoptions. This article is solely focused on blasting an organization that has brought together lots of families matching deserving children with deserving parents. No one commenting here knows more than what they read. You don’t know what lengths CAS went through to search for this man. In NC you have to go through great lengths to search for birth fathers because they have to give consent or a substantiated effort from the agency/legal entities have to be shown. You don’t know if the birth mother said the real name and then changed her mind (it’s fully believable that a birth mom isn’t sure of who the father is or doesn’t even know who the father is). All agencies have to follow the law (they don’t get to make up their own rules). The other side that the other comments haven’t addressed because they clearly don’t understand or care is, you don’t know how long the adoptive parents have been waiting for a child they’ve probably been thinking about, praying about. Lets say you and your spouse were unable to have children, then after waiting for who knows how long for the child of your dreams, you’re finally blessed with a child… Six months after you’ve been talking to, singing to, loving, feeding, (being the parent’s you’ve always dreamed about) someone – birth father or not- is trying to take that child from you. How would you feel? Let’s just say I already know how you’d feel. So you can try to condemn a completely legitimate agency – but open your eyes to the fact that there’s more to the whole story than you give credit to.
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Hi Openeyes,
Thanks for commenting on our article about Christian Adoption Services in Matthews NC. Before we begin our reply, you are incorrect about one thing and that is that the agency HAS to by law go through this and that to discover a birth father, because in this case the biological father and mother were not married and in NC Fathers who are not married to mothers have zero rights to children. Christian Adoption Services is squarely within the legal bounds of the law, but our issue is with morality (especially as a “Christian” adoption agency). The fact that we as a society have come to overlook that Mothers can create children that they don’t know who the father is, kids they can’t afford, or have no interest in, and have access to abort, adopt out, or give to a safe haven facility and then be called saints which fathers who don’t even know they have children, create kids they can’t afford, or have no interest in are called deadbeats.
I have no doubt that the birth mother manipulated and lied so that Christian Adoption Services could not find the birth father because more than likely she didn’t want to be on the hook for child support for 18 years. But once the birth father is found, for any agency to say “too bad, we tried” KNOWING that the law protects mothers who lie and manipulate smells fishy (especially from one that is “Christian” in nature).
All adoptions need to stop until Mothers identify Fathers. I don’t care if we have to go through nine fathers. Now, I know that people like you and the adoption industry that makes money from adoptions don’t want that, but they reality is knowing who your biological parents are and benefiting from that far outweighs any adoptive parents that have waited years and years to have a child.
But I will say this, I actually have sat down with the birth father in this matter and seen with my own eyes some significant data that may have suggested this agency knew how to get in touch with the birth father.
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I would say that before you adopt a baby there are two pretty vital questions to ask. “Do we have the mother’s permission?” and “Do we have the father’s permission?”. People don’t just forget to ask these questions. If they are not asked before the child leaves the hospital (forget about six months later)… it’s certainly no accident. I’ve heard nothing about the adoptive parents receiving forged documents with the father’s consent. They had to have known he had not provided consent. Trying to go forward with an adoption under those circumstances is very wrong.
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Unfortunately, in all US States except one, nobody has to ask the question “Do we have the Fathers consent” if the parents are not married. Per NC Law, Christian Adoption Services has every legal right to ask the mother not to identify the Father and conceal even the pregnancy.
I do not believe I have to explain where this is in NO way Christian mentality.
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I appreciate your reply and opinions stompkinsnc.
As everyone knows with anything there are always extreme cases. I would say that this is an instance of that. CAS has a very good reputation for years and like anything it takes years to build a good reputation, but an instant to destroy it. I don’t believe the wrongdoing was on the part of the agency (in my opinion)
Although this specific birth father may be different… but it is also my concern with anyone claiming to be a concerned father but wasn’t proactive in his own responsibilities (how many times does a guy contact everyone he had sex with to ensure he doesn’t have offspring to take care of and be responsible for?). I’d say this should be a call for all potential fathers to step-up and be proactive.
I’m all for knowing who the birth father is – in my opinion I want to know who both parents are, even if only for medical information, I guess my wife and I are different in the fact that we hope to have an open adoption, at the end of the day we would still be the parents…
Let’s be clear about adoption cost… the adoptive parents (ie my wife and I will be paying for the adoption – not the birth father or birth mother or anyone else and it is a very large expense but worth it)
The other HUGE point I was attempting to make here is that other side of the coin this article doesn’t address. The adoptive parents and how they did nothing wrong but in some way they have less rights than a father that didn’t keep contact with his sexual partner enough to stay with her or seek after her enough to be sure he didn’t have potential offspring since it would be his responsibility if any existed…? I don’t agree with that argument and it’s fine if you don’t agree with me, but there are more lives affected in this article than the birth father, and how moral/ethical would it be to take a child from innocent, deserving parents that have called it their own for 6 months, you talk about ripping someones heart out.
We have differing opinions and there may have been other things that could have been done pre-adoption, but the punishment of adoptive parents for someone else’s mistake or potential wrongdoing is unacceptable in my book (and taking a child from the adoptive parents is punishment).
I just hope that my comments allowed people to see more than one side of the story. There can be instances when situations don’t go the way you want, but the world is bigger than “I”.
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Openeyes,
I do not think that this is an extreme example, according to the latests statistics 40% of children born today come into the world via unmarried parents and in these cases the fathers have zero rights to the children unless he legitimates the child… but exactly how is he supposed to do that if he is never told that he fathered a child? Not extreme at all!
Fathers to be pro-active and take reponsibility really? Here is some information for you sir, men don’t exists to take care of women and support them. Women have independence and equality today, and this birth mother beared EVERY irresponsibility in not contacting everyone she had sex with and saying “I’ve had a child, I want to give you the option to test the child and raise it before I adopt out”. The fact that you just blamed the father with a straight face as a man is infuriating. I want to see you have to go overseas for work, your wife be pregnant and adopt out without telling you and have someone say because you weren’t there for the child the adoption is legal. Your a sick man to blame the father on this one.
All adoptions in NC should stop immediately until Mothers STEP-UP and stop creating babies with their “choice” and playing victims because the father didnt support her knowing that she never told him there was a child.
I surmise your taking the birth mothers side because as a prospective adoptive parent it fits well for you and I also suspect you have a bias towards fathers because they can put a halt to your hopeful plans.
Way to go dad!
Also, we said that Christian Adoption Services is covered legally and did nothing under the law wrong. But for you, and surmising that you are a christian, the fact that you would WANT to keep a child knowing that a biological father was duped sir, says you have “I” in mind.
And who is to say that the birth mother in this situation is the one that initiated the termination of the relationship? Are you so blind to think that only men ruin relationships? What if she ended the relationship and said don’t contact me again?
Your so blind because you want a baby, that your advocating for a system that is about as Christian as New Orleans on Mardi Gras.
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We used CAS years ago….one big mistake. I am sorry they screwed you over….I know the feeling!
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What did they do?
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It’s called a TPR (termination of parental rights). The legal process any agency has to follow when there is an “unknown” birth father. The author of this article cleary should research and understand adoption laws before blasting an agency. Adoptive parent of two.
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No you really should do your homework on NC adoption laws. In NC, a woman can refuse to say who a father is, and that father becomes “unknown” allowing for an adoptive parent to get a child. I realize there are legitimate cases where a woman simply does not know. But there are cases where she simply wants the child adopted out and selectively forgets who the father is.
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You can debate adoption laws and voice your biased opinions all day long but the bottom line is both parties shared a responsibility here, and yes, this includes the birth father. Did you interview the birth mother too or just take the fathers word on what happened? This is clearly a one sided story that has no value and reflects nothing about the reality of the adoption process.
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We are more involved in the court proceedings than you were I can assure you that. I know that adoptive parents hate people talking about this and it’s been surprising seeing the Christian one’s pushing the hardest. The bottom line is, and thankfully it’s getting way more attention, is that in NC a woman can get pregnant, not even inform the father that she is pregnant, and adot the child out.
Of course adoption agencies and adoptive parents love this system because you only have to go through one person to get what you want rather than two. And, the adoption agencies get paid. So much for Christians who believe in children having access to both a father and mother.
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Actually it’s much easier for adoptive parents to have the consent of both the birth mother and father. This avoids the need for a TPR, publications, attorney fees, etc. This also avoids the fear of a birth parent realizing they have a child somewhere later on and deciding they’d like to have them back, like in your story here. I’ve never met an adoptive parent that hoped for the consent of only one birth parent, and I’ve met a lot. So, rather than this being a system that’s loved by adoptive parents and agencies, it’s actually a nightmare and cost both the parents and agency more money. And you’re right, NC is giving attention to and advocating adoption harder than ever, so much they’re now offering a tax credit that’s 50% of the federal credit making it affordable for more people to adopt. Look, I know there’s a right way and a wrong way to adopt and I don’t dispute that. In a perfect world, both birth parents would consent and support each other through this difficult and emotional process, but this world is far from perfect. There’s a shared responsibility here, and if a man is gonna plant his seed he should hang around long enough to see if anything grows. Just saying….
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If you are going to advocate that men who plant their seed should stay around to see if anything develops while not advocating that women who spread their legs should be held responsible for what comes out makes you a suck fuck and exactly why men get the short end of the stick in these cases. For a Christian adoption agency to be doing business knowing that one parent can withhold information on who the birth father may be and actually lobbying for that to stay in place is getting out and putting a black mark over adoptions in NC.
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Is anyone actually surprised that Christian adoptive parents are doing this and that Christian adoption agencies operate under these laws?
These are the same Christians that say how important biological family is, how important it is for a child to have a mother and father as god decided.
Yet, they are getting children from a system that encourages single parent births and fathers not being told they have children.
Good ole Christian hypocrisy.
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And given the Christian divorce rate, remarriage, divorce, remarriage, the men in these situations who are advocating for this system like the one above who finally make it to divorce court and custody court only to become visitor paying money to the government… as an organization trying to stop this I think these men deserve it.
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For those saying that fathers are to blame for this for not sticking around, you are assuming that the mother didn’t end the relationship and pushed him aside then acted within the law to not provide information about him so that an adoption can take place.
I can assure you the Christians operating within this system are in church on Sunday raising their hands high praying to God about the importance of marriage, biology, etc… while looking at their new adopted child knowing that they got them via a system that is more about lies and sin rather than good.
But yes, we are talking about Christians here.
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